Of Floods and Things from Circuses

'For behold, I will bring a flood of waters upon the earth, to destroy all flesh in which is the breath of life from under heaven; everything that is on the earth shall die.' Genesis 6:17.

So, uh, England is cool. Unlike Andrew I do not feel the need to justify my imbibing (or incriminate myself), but I would like to point out that anything Michael insinuates about the ladies and I is, naturally, a lie. Michael and Andrew do have groupies, but I don't think Alissa and Lindsey need worry too much. The sheer godliness of these two gentlemen invariably attract the ladies, but I think they will behave.

Or will they? (picture of a menacing hawk).

But, because I saw that the women flocked to these bethrothed men, because I inferred that these CCCU kids were intellectual weenies, because the women had beards, because I wanted to bring damnation upon Michael's friend Dr. Rosenfuck, because I saw that the males lusted after George Bush in a way that they themselves condemned, because this is Englad dammit, I decided to flood the basement. So I told Michael and Andrew to go into the upper room and sit in washing tubs and I procceeded to start the washing machine. Mankind narrowly escaped this time, but I am working on it. So far during our sterling lectures and intellectual conversation, I have contemplated what I would most like to be able to shoot out my hands (fire or lightning), jumping crucifixition style out windows (this poetic death would only kill me and frighten people, but it might redeem the world by getting SCIO shut down), and tried to look into Andrew's water bottle so hard that I could see the individual molecules and bacterium...so soon I should develop the superpower neccesary to pull the moon down onto the earth.

Maybe things aren't as bad as all that: maybe these kids aren't that bad; maybe they only worship C.S. Lewis, maybe they only dream about C.S. Lewis, maybe they only send fucking books about fucking C.S. Lewis to their fucking girlfriends, out of something pure in their hearts. And maybe Michael has decided to drop classics and study Pauline theology. Yes, until we see otherwise I think we are going to just have to assume that it really is that bad...that there will continue you to be a good deal of masturbation on the part of our students and director, and many references to falling frogs, and slaying firstborn sons, and eating children in pies, and Achilles emerging from a river of blood on our part.

And that is why you are reading, isn't it? You will notice that I have managed to reference Noah, the plagues of Egypt, Paul, C.S. Lewis, and sacrificial redemption in this post (not to mention Chaucer, Star Wars, Titus Andronichus, and Homer), thus meeting the Christian-centric nature of our blog. You probably won't even need to go to church today having read this.

So hopefully that will serve as a little introduction of some of what I can bring to this blog and your life. Check back soon for more forthcoming on the journey Andrew and I took through the English jungle to reach the inner circle of the CCCU and a strange fellow we call our roommate. Now, if you will excuse me, I must go check the drier...it has been running for about two hours now and my clothes might be halfway dry...or maybe they will start an electrical fire and all of Crick road can be destroyed with fire and water.

Justin